Introducing ANIMAL PSYCHOLOGY 101
Players:
Team A – Neighbour’s cat.
Team B – Higgovale pigeon.
***ACTION COMMENCES***
- Cat stalks pigeon.
- Cat delights in executing a complex series of feline ninja moves – slinks behind parked cars, slithers along ground, freezes in the face of potential avian sighting.
[Analysis: cat extremely pleased with itself. Pigeon unconcerned, possibly in denial.]
- Cat now Extremely Close to pigeon.
- Pigeon aware of left field infiltration, turns to face cat. Cat bares jaws, quivering with barely-suppressed bloodlust.
- Pigeon clearly did not read rules of engagement; is utterly unconcerned, gazes blankly at cat.
- Cat shows signs of deep confusion, rapidly losing confidence in game strategy.
- Pigeon executes cheeky manoeuvre, strutting up to cat’s face with ‘so whaddya gonna do about it?’ look plastered over its beak.
- Cat knows it has lost. Turns away, slinks off.
Team analysis of cat strategy and thoughts: “This is not how pigeons are supposed to act. This must be an avian deviant. It displays no fear. It does not play hard to get. This is, therefore, no fun at all. I will find me a more compliant, chaseable chick.”
Is this a metaphor? Are there applications for all creatures great and small?
You tell me.
